Did anyone see me?

Okay, guys, you know the problem…every once in awhile, if we’re not paying attention to what we’re doing, we drop our bike. Some of you may have already experienced a drop with your California Scooter.

Fortunately, California Scooters are pretty light, which makes it easy to get them back up on their feet, and usually no damage results. On other bikes, well, let’s just say it’s a lot easier to run up a big repair bill than it is to get the things up off the ground.

I originally wrote this piece for a friend who dropped a very expensive Italian motorcycle while putting it on the sidestand (that was a $2,000 tip over). He was really upset with himself and I thought he might enjoy hearing about the times I dropped my bikes. I stopped writing after I remembered the fifth or sixth incident because I was laughing so hard I thought I might hurt myself…. So, here goes….

Drop Number 1 – Impromptu Stargazing

I was on my ’82 Honda CBX and my buddy Lou was on his Gold Wing. That CBX was a magnificent bike. I bought mine from Steve’s brother Ron (it was 10 years old when I got it and it only had 4500 miles on the clock). It was pristine.

Lou and I were wrapping up a hard 500-mile day through Arizona. I know what you are thinking….500 miles is not that much for a solid day’s riding, but it was brutally hot in the way that only Arizona can be in the summertime. I was tired, a little bit dehydrated, and I wasn’t as sharp as I should have been. That’s a bad combination on a motorcycle.

We stopped for gas and Louis filled up first. While I was filling up the CBX, Lou rode over to the air hose to top off his tires. I filled my big Honda, fired it up, and rode over to Lou, paralleling the curb. I put my kickstand down and started to lean the CBX over. The next thing I knew I was staring at the stars.

I had no idea what happened, and then I realized…wow…I had fallen off my motorcycle. I was on my back looking at the stars above Arizona.

My first thought? “Did anyone see me?”

How could that this have happened? Well, what happened was this: When I extended the sidestand, it hit the curb before it fully extended, and it didn’t go over center. When I leaned the CBX over, it just kept on going.

Total damage? One turn signal lens cover, one scratched fairing (still got that scratch), and lots of lost pride.

Drop Number 2 – Lock-to-Lock Is Important

This time, I was easing into my own driveway on my 2-week-old Suzuki TL1000S. Gorgeous bike. Bright red. A real rocketship. As I executed a 90-degree turn into the driveway, I pulled the bars to keep my balance.

The Suzuki was designed for high speed stability, not low speed maneuverability. Turn-to-turn lock on the Suzuki was waaaay less than any motorcycle I had ever ridden.

The bottom line? I couldn’t turn the forks far enough to keep my balance at low speed.

The results? BAM!

The TL and I were both on our sides in my own driveway!

My first thought? “Did anyone see me?”

Total damage? One scratched fairing and lots of lost pride. Lots and lots of lost pride.

Drop Number 3 – The Sidestand, Again

A couple of weeks after Drop Number 2, I was letting my now 4-week-old, slightly-scratched TL1000S warm up in the driveway. The bike was on its sidestand, facing north.

Just past my garage door, the driveway slopes down ever so slightly. Ever, ever so slightly. I mean, hardly any slope at all.

Out of the corner of my eye, I thought I saw the Suzuki move forward a bit. Nah, I thought, it’s gotta be an optical illusion.

A second later: BAM!

The Suzuki was on its side! Wow, I first thought, this motorcycle sure likes laying down in my driveway.

My second thought? “Did anyone see me?”

The results? I couldn’t tell. The fairing was scratched, but maybe it was the same scratch from 2 weeks ago.

No lost pride this time, but lots of cussing about Suzuki engineering and lousy sidestands.

Drop Number 4 – Dismounting Suzukis As An Olympic Event

This time I was winding out my 4-month old TL1000S on the road from my brother-in-law’s place. Hard. Awesome performance.

Wow, I thought, this thing is fast. I must have hit 80 miles an hour when I realized I gotta slow down.

That Suzuki slipper clutch works great, I thought…. just keep downshifting and it’s almost like an ABS system on the rear wheel.

Hmmh, that curve is coming up fast. Maybe I’ll just give it a touch of front brake. So I did.

Uh oh, I thought. I had unloaded the rear wheel when I touched the front brake. The corner was really coming up fast now, and the back end was fishtailing impressively. As I write this, I recall it as impressive. At the time, “fishtailing terrifyingly” would probably have been more descriptive.

I almost had the bike stopped when the front wheel just touched the curb.

Down we both went, again.

I executed a precision somersault as I departed controlled flight and rolled up into a sitting position.

My first thought? “Did anyone see me?”

This time, the answer was yes. There was a lady in a station wagon. I didn’t even think they still made station wagons. She stopped and and asked, “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, lady, I did that on purpose.” I didn’t know what else to say.

The results? I couldn’t tell. Maybe it was just the same scratched fairing. Again, lots and lots of lost pride. No injuries, though. My lucky day.

Drop Number 5 – The Prize Winner

This time I was changing the front tire on the CBX in my garage. I put the bike on the center stand and removed the front wheel. Bikes with center stands are great, I thought. Makes it a lot easier to change tires. I was quite a bit younger than. I had knocked down a few beers when I thought it would be a good idea to remove the front wheel so I could get a new front tire.

You can kind of guess where this one is going.

Once I had the front wheel off the CBX I started thinking about the replacement tire. I used Bridgestone Spitfires on that bike and they were great. I decided I would get the raised-white-letter Spitfires this time. That would really look cool.

Well, I thought, if I get a raised-white-letter front tire, I’ll have to get the back tire to match. So, I thought, I might as well take the back wheel off while I’m out here. I’ll just get them both changed at the same time.

In case you missed it, this is the point at which things decidedly turned south. Or maybe it was earlier…when I had those two or three beers.

What could I have possibly been thinking? Oh, wait, I remember. I was thinking how incredibly cool raised white letter tires would look on my white CBX. So, I started to remove the rear wheel. That’s right, the rear wheel. Bear in mind, I already had the front wheel off the bike.

The rear axle bolt was on really tight. I needed a bigger wrench, you know, more leverage, that sort of thing. I thought I might as well get another beer while I was up, too. I grabbed another beer, got the longer wrench, found the leverage I was looking for…and…and…uh oh…

The CBX started to roll forward off the center stand. Hmmh. No front wheel.

It was funny how everything seemed to go in slow motion all of sudden. And it was funny how I suddenly realized the bike wouldn’t balance itself on the center stand with both wheels removed. An epiphanous moment, as they say.

If you’re gonna drop a bike, guys, don’t do it this way. It was bad. The CBX fell forward with a sharp crack (that was the no-longer-in-production crankcase fracturing on the concrete). Then it made a sickening lean to the left. Right into my wife’s brand new Acura.

The bottom line? One dinged up Acura, one thoroughly upset wife, one busted and cracked CBX crankcase, oil all over the garage floor, and the certain knowledge that, well, nobody saw me actually do it. But there was lots of evidence.

So, if you’ve ever dropped your bike, don’t feel too bad about it. It happens to all of us.

Sometimes more than once.